Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
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