..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
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