I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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