on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
