Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
