belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
