can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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