i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
