He told me they were just razor bumps!
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
