Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
