i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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