At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I think people are normalizing furries
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