Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
