we're blogging at a bar
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
