Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
