My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
