You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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