I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
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