this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
