Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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