Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
