Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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