He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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