it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
This show inspires me to have sex in space
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
