Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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