one two three fourrrrnication!
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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