it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
