So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
