And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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