jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Semen is not good for contacts.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
