SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
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