you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
