I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
