her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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