you turned your livingroom into a bong?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
