great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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