I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
