I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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