i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
We left the knife in your bed.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
