So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
