is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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