"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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