He uses pillows to masturbate.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
