have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
