Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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