Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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