My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
being pregnant is like rehab
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize