Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Randomize
