Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
