Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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