Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
