I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
